Dear Nieces and Nephews,
I hope this invitation finds you well, but from what I’ve seen and heard lately, it may not be the case with some of you. I have a birthday coming up soon and you all are invited. It’s going to be an awesome celebration even though I am not well these days. Unfortunately, I am sick and haven’t been myself lately, but time stops for no one. I know we all are tired and weary, but I really need you present in hopes that I will soon be better.
As it may be, it’s time to celebrate my birthday once again. You all are so beautiful and unique. So many talents and abilities. Such creativity and intelligence. I’m proud to have you as part of my family even though some of you aren’t happy with me or seemingly don’t want to be part of the family anymore. I love you regardless and hope you know you are always welcome to be a part of this family. I just wish that you could see how hard I’ve worked to provide a better way of life for you.
Here he goes again, right? I don’t want to lecture you, but my purpose is far too important to not remind you of the ground I’ve covered. My hair is white and the lines are cracking my face, but my rough hands and blue collar are testimony to my continued efforts to give you opportunity. I’ve never been afraid of work and I’ve always been there to assist you in any way necessary to help this family continue it’s pursuit. Even though you may shout against me, I’ve done everything I can to demonstrate my love.
My hands ached and cracked open with frost bite as I helped General Washington and his discouraged men crack through the ice as they crossed the frozen Delaware River. The sleet pelted us and discouraged our progress, but my cause was too important to let the family down. I pushed the men ahead to significant victory and changed the course of our history.
I sat with Miss Betsy Ross as she took a needle and thread and stitched red and white stripes together. Man, oh man, could that woman sew. And she stitched those flags for you and me. She had flags flying over buildings, over ships, over forts, and over just about anything that could hold a flag. All because of me.
One of her flags flew over Fort McHenry, just outside of Baltimore. I fought with the men there in 1812. Bloodshed all night but somehow I’ve always been able to find courage and resilience for the family when everyone wanted to just give up. My friend, Francis Key, watched the boys and me dig down deep and fight with everything we had one night. In the early dawn after the battle, he looked across the bay and saw the torn and tattered Miss Ross Special barely waving in the breeze. He penned a poem giving praise to this great thing we have going. You still get to freely sing that poem at school and baseball games even though some might not.
Later on I watched you fight each other, but every family has their fights. One of the best things about this family is unity, but we actually fought and killed each other. So many talents and abilities. Such creativity and intelligence. And such stupidity. I sat with President Abraham Lincoln as he anguished over these battles and as he gave the executive order known as the Emancipation Proclamation making sure everyone in our family could really feel free to be a part of the family. Sometimes the hardest punches bring the sweetest kisses. It took time, but we began to forgive each other and live in freedom, love, and unity.
I was with you all as we rebuilt our own destruction. That’s how it’s done. You got up and made it happen and didn’t wait on me to do it for you. Business began to flourish and factories were built. One of the great things about this family is that we began to make things. We farmed things. We mined things. Railroads were laid up and down and across my belly and we started to find travel easier. Like I said, you guys are so creative and intelligent. We showed the world how things can be done when you have a freedom to enjoy life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
But with freedom comes great responsibility. Some didn’t like our way of life and sought to end it. You answered my call to help keep this nation and others be free as well. We built warships and sailed them. We built warplanes and flew them. We trained at Parris Island, Fort Bragg, San Diego Bay, and Camp Pendleton and liberated the world. TWICE. Your great-great grandfathers, great grandfathers, and grandfathers were AMAZING. And I was there with them. I was there in the bloody foxhole in France. I heard the screams as the U.S.S. Arizona sank at Pearl Harbor. I was there with our youngest as we ran on to the beaches at Normandy and the bullets ripped through us. I was with our boys flying over Hiroshima and Nagasaki when they opened a glimpse of hell. I was with your Papa when he had the Purple Heart pinned to his chest and with your Uncle Joe that came home missing a leg.
After these wars our family expanded quickly. You guys started having babies like rabbits and even got them nicknamed Boomers. And boy they loved their drive-in movies and Rock’n’Roll music. But somehow we just can’t live in peace and we started sending our Boomers to fight wars in Southeast Asia. You answered my call once again even though many of you didn’t get to come home. But I was there.
Our family began to once again enjoy a time of peace even though you guys created disco and bell bottoms. What were you thinking? Every family has its skeletons in the closet I guess. We overcame crooked politicians because our family is bigger than that. Some of our family was held hostage in Iran. We overcame that, too. The family had business and economic expansion again only to have more war. Why can’t we live in peace? But you, my wonderful nieces and nephews, answered the call to the Middle East bravely and ferociously making me proud once again. I was hoping for family peace at that point, but a group of lunatics flew planes into some of our buildings. I was with President Bush when he said that either you are for us or against us. I was with Seal Team Six when they showed precision and demonstrated to everyone in the world what happens when our freedom is threatened.
And then there’s the last few years….
I have become very ill and am concerned for what is at hand. STOP COMPLAINING.
Our family unity is shaken by selfishness and forced ideology. Our drive is dragging because the prosperity has created laziness and weakness. Our will is weakened by those that would say our freedom has made them a victim instead of seizing opportunity I provided. Technology has become your god creating convenience instead of strength. Perhaps I’ve spoiled you.
Call me a grumpy old man if you’d like. I mean, it is my 247th Birthday, but I love you all so much and we’ve worked so hard to build this family. Please, I’m begging you, come celebrate my birthday on this 4th of July like you never have before. Think about all those nieces and nephews before you and what they did to give you this life. Sure, eat that barbecue. Enjoy the waves of the Atlantic and Pacific crashing. Watch the sunset over the cornfields of my belly. Hike my peaks. Hug those babies tightly. Hold hands and kiss while the fireworks pop loudly overhead and think of the ultimate sacrifices that have been given so that I can have another birthday celebration.
Decide now to ENJOY my birthday and EVERY day living in this place called America.
This land is your land and this land is my land
From California to the New York Island
From the redwood forest to the Gulf Stream waters
This land was made for you and me
I’ll close with stealing a comment from one of my nephews. “Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country.” I know the greatness lies within each and every one of you. Let’s blow out these birthday candles TOGETHER.
I’m counting on you,
Your Uncle Sam
